I miss my best friend

I have not seen my best friend in over a month. It's been tough. He was the most dependable friend I had. I could always count on him to make my day. And now, he's nowhere in sight. But I'm not talking about a person, I'm talking about my little buddy Zoloft. I have no shame. I don't care that you know I took Zoloft.
I quit taking it to see if I could handle it. I'll let you be the judge of that.

WITH ZOLOFT:
*** I always had a smile on my face.
***I didn't care that Brody was swinging from the ceiling fan.
***Avery's chewing on a marker? Ah, it'll wash off.
***I could not get enough of Quackadoo's duck sweatshirt.
***There wasn't much that could set me off.
***I had no idea Walker was talented enough to completely tear apart the blinds. Good job son!
***All the stupid drama out there didn't phase me at all.
***I looked forward to going to work every day.
***I was actually a morning person! bahahahahaha...who am I kidding? I will never be a morning person.

NOW....WITHOUT ZOLOFT:
***You mean I have to smile at that joke?
***Brody, I don't wanna hear it when you cut your hand off.
***I still can't get enough of Quackadoo's duck sweatshirt! LOL!
***Look at me wrong, and I'm liable to jack your jaws. Just saying....
***When I'm driving and I see a person on the road, I wonder to myself how many points I could get by hitting them.
***Also when I'm driving, I want to run over the little cars who drive too slow, or don't turn on their blinker, or just because I don't like that car.
***When I see or hear stupid drama, it's all I can do to contain myself and not tell people to grow up and get a life. You're an adult, for crying out loud!!!!!!!
***Have I mentioned I still love the duck sweatshirt?
***I dread going to work every day. But Kevin won't let me quit. He says I can if we want to sell everything we own. Think I'll pass on that.

So anyway, I don't know about you, but I think it's obvious I need to get my little buddy back.